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Heart & Mind

Heart & Mind

One knows the heart one knows the mind together one beat through the sands of time.

A destructive force though history has revealed the time is ripe for them to heal.

Ill deeds cannot be undone you must learn from mistakes and move the hell on.

They have evolved and their understanding is clear but the universe is claiming payments left in arrears

A story like the ones legends are written for

Paris and Helen even started a war

Evil deeds caused by a past incarnation led to the current fucked up situation.

The cosmos have imposed a swift sentence they cannot be together and its a lifetime penance

But the bond is strong and couldn’t be broken so they were allowed a moment of discretion

Careful consideration is needed the karma of the fierce two cannot be repeated

So let’s let the universe control the body and mind and remember to reunite only on the number nine.

In hell…

You gave what was needed before even asked.

How you knew puts me to task

We never spoke…still haven’t. Yet you’re always right on time with a clever poke

Silence is not for lack of desire quite the contrary its a roaring fire

The longer it takes the stronger the need grows

Which is not a good thing you have your own woes

I wish I had the energy for this undertaking

But I’m trapped in a nightmare of my own making

There’s no way out every route leads to destruction

You deserve love and sheer devotion.

I had the ability once and I guess I still do but faith, hope, and trust have been robbed and left me shattered and abused.

I’m not what we thought I was and seems I’ve never been

Else he would not have mocked and humiliated me to no end.

Oh yes, a new low has been established with twists and turns that far exceed our one quick burn.

Recovery is hard and something forever severed I’m no longer sure its worth the effort

I wish I knew what was in your heart what you desired of me

It would be so much easier to act accordingly

But alas you’ve grown as quiet as me so I have to just let things be

Broken

Understanding so much and so little at the same time

What’s yours is still yours and you also claim mine.

Now its come out I was an even bigger fool than before

The last one in on it the last to know more

So concerned with what I was doing and who I was with

While you’re out parading and galavanting like I don’t mean shit

Someone spoke up for me and even it wasn’t enough

No one tells you what to do because you’re so tough.

The damage done is worse than I thought

I now have to decide of I’m staying or not

Trapped

What is left for me to say or feel?

You bash and berate and leave me no appeal.

I’m useless, worthless, trash that never stands up you never done anything

You say I make you feel like a fool.

You tell me to my face I’m not attractive, nasty tramp who you try to pimp out to all in your camp.

Vows and promises made can’t be kept since its been announced I’m a wretch.

Ashamed of what all has been said

I had no idea and makes me wish I were dead

Imprisoned in a relationship of one sided love cannot leave for fear of two boys.

What will be said to them of their mother in her absence

Subtle and behind the lines all to make sense

Unwanted behaviors and actions couldn’t possibly come from you

Put them all on me for being a fool.

What of the girls who’ve already lost one mother

Struggling day after day listening to your brother!

Silly nicknames, words of disrespect and slander

And yall let him go on like it doesn’t matter.

I don’t understand this family of yours so much hateration and much more

What I’ve gotten myself into there’s no way out except death

But I’ve been called to do many more things and haven’t started yet

misunderstood muse

misunderstood muse

Wow! Here we go! One hell of a line…all shiny like new money, “Come with me he’s not worth your time.”

The grass is always greener the get what you want and you become meaner!

Are you happy? Do you want to leave? Does he love you, do you believe?

What about what I want? What about what I need? No one ever asks those questions they’re too hard to heed.

To own me and control me that’s what they want, a trinket a trophy to flash and flaunt.

Knowing me means loving me this much I understand. Most people draw a line in the sand.

Some chose to dance to the song, but never seem to last for long. I give so much and all are willing to take none are willing to think of the sacrifices I make.

I can’t change who I am or how I deal I can only express how I feel. The list continues to grow those things I need and want.

Someone will some day ask although it seems doubtful at this point.

Hidden

Bit O honey on hold

Bit O honey on hold

Something left unsaid, but not exactly a lie…

The lips are zipped tight and she has no idea why.

She’s fiercely intense he wants to know more

But with so much chaos she must be ignored…..for now

So many distractions…demands he has enough to deal with

She’ll just make it worse so why risk ruining it.

Its crazy she gets it and doesn’t want to be a pest,

A burden, a disruption, an even bigger mess.

He has to figure out what he wants…

Maybe she showed him and he needs no more prompts.

Its supposed to be fun and good times, not disrupt his life and turn it on a dime.

So when its time to once again take a break…a walk on the wild side–love with no strings

Remember her! The one that did things.

Stirred deep inside you..made you want to be deep in her

That Bit O Honey Slow Jam is something for sure.

Relentless

Just because I ask something of you does not mean you’re lacking or dumb..dear LORD I’m tired of this run!

Everything is taken so personal and puts you on defense its childish stupid and makes no sense.

I give all of me without question with happiness and undying devotion and its thrown back in my face and then I’m shunned.

I only want to love you and share a life together but its not enough and you always tell me I could do better.

Nothing I do is ever good enough you’re overly critical no care concern or consideration just bitterness.

Maybe I should just stop asking for what I need I feel I’m a burden not your wife or even a person you see.

Everything that’s mine is yours and everything that’s yours is yours nothing left for me

Not even a measure of safety or security…

© 2012 Slave Free Zone

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